Cereal Killer

So, there I was, eating my bowl of Grape Nuts for breakfast, and reading the box. Hmm, this is interesting, I'm thinking to myself. It's a Grape Nuts diet plan. The box is telling me that if I eat the cereal for two meals a day, and eat sensibly for the third meal, and get some exercise, I can lose ten pounds. It doesn't say how long it will take, but hey, ten pounds is ten pounds. And, i do enjoy the nutty, wholesome taste of Grape Nuts. Maybe I should give this a try.
Then it hits me. Like a bolt out of the blue, I realize, duh, it's the people who make Grape Nuts who want me to make that two-thirds of my daily diet. Of course they do. I'm sure they're not at all thinking about how that will impact their sales. Obviously, their only concern is for my health.
How stupid do I look Mr. Grape Nuts Manufacturer? What's next - a total Grape Nuts diet? Nice try, but I guess I'm just one step ahead of you. I guess I just shot down your little scheme...nipped it in the bud, if you will.
But then, I get to thinking, I wonder how many other manufacturers have tried that little trick on me. For instance, for years, I've been following the directions on my shampoo bottle: "Shampoo. Rinse. Shampoo again." I used to think, before they reduced me to robotic-like obedience, that a second shampooing didn't make much sense. But, I figured, they (they, being the makers of the shampoo) knew best. So, I did it. I probably washed the natural sheen out of my hair in an effort to comply with their wishes.
How foolish I now feel. I have (along with, no doubt, millions of others) been duped by these money-hungry industrialist, who care nothing about my hair, only about padding their overseas bank accounts. Actually, I don't know anything about overseas bank accounts, but it sounded pretty good.
Now, I'm suspicious about everything. For instance, I've been taking an aspirin a day for years as a precaution, due to some heart problems. But maybe that's just a ploy by the aspirin manufacturers. Maybe, people weren't taking enough aspirin so they come up with this heart safety idea.
Of course, keep in mind that when it comes to ignorance, I am out in the forefront. Don't stop taking your daily aspirin just because I mouth off. I don't even play a doctor on TV. But, I do have to wonder how often I fall victim to the wily ways of Madison Avenue.
Is Listerine really killing those germs in my mouth? Did I ever truly have combination skin? Is there any such thing? Why does shampoo have to smell like a telephone pole to fight dandruff? Now my head is spinning. I'm so confused. I'm going to go lie down, take an aspirin, and eat another bowl of Grape Nuts.