Good Morning Hong Kong

Have you ever seen one of those grade-B magic acts where the magician puts the girl in the box and then sticks swords in the box? I'm sure you have. Once, for whatever reason...maybe the magician was drunk...anyway, he (the magician) let us come up onstage and see how he did it. There was the poor girl squeezed up in this small box, with her knees up around her neck, in some horribly-contorted ball shaped human sort of thing.
I would never have thought I could have squeezed myself up that way. But, I just completed a 16-hour flight to Hong Kong, on a United Airlines 747, and, you know what, it can be done. United calls it "economy seating." I call it greedily cramming as many passengers into the plane as humanly possible.
Besides the fact that I was boxed in between the window and two (very nice) gentleman from Singapore, the flight was fine. Plenty of food, drink, and exceptionally bland movies that I never would have paid to watch. But, when you're balled up in a wad, using every sort of self-psychotherapy to keep from hyperventilating and creating a scene, you'll watch just about anything, including Martin Lawrence in Rebound.
The food wasn't good, but it was a diversion. I ate every bite of everything they offered, figuring it would help me keep my mind off the fact that I was totally devoid of any ability to move. Actually, I lie. I did move some. I'm sure to my seat-mates, I was a rather pathetic twitching old man. I kept having to scratch my back. And, every time I did, my elbow slammed into the guy next to me. Add to that, the fact that every twenty minutes I had to get both of the other passengers next to me to let me out for a restroom break, then just when they'd get settled back in, there I was standing in the aisle, begging to be allowed to climb over them again. I kept hoping they'd offer to move in and let me have the aisle seat. Nope. I guess they figured they'd rather get up than having to be boxed in themselves.
I really am a klutz. On my last trip down the aisle to the restroom, I noticed after I'd travelled about half the length of the plane that when I had put my shoes back on, I had stepped on the handle part of a plastic bag I had lying on the floor. The bag contained some snacks I had purchased just in case. Anyway, here I was dragging this bag down the aisle with me. I'm sure I looked liked the total goober I am.
On a more interesting note, I did not know the plane would be flying north over the Arctic Circle to get to Hong Kong. That has to be one of my bigger thrills in life. Just to have the bragging rights to say I've flown over the North Pole is huge. I'll see how many conversations I can work that in to. We must have spent five hours or so over the Arctic Circle. I was only keeping time by the number of horrible movies it took to fly over. It really does look just like the pictures, which I guess makes sense.
Anyway, as I write, it's Tuesday morning here in Hong Kong...Monday evening EDT. And, there's a whole world out there waiting to be discovered. I'll tell you more tomorrow about what I find.